Did you ever have a young brother (friend, boss, frenemy, business partner) cover his ears and say, “I cannot hear you, I’m not listening, la la la la la la you can’t make me!”
How did you respond?
How does anyone usually respond?
People long to be heard. People abhor having others shut their voices down.
What do people want?
To be told, “I’m listening.” And then, have someone actually listen.
What do people want?
To have their opinion valued, simply for existing.
To have their opinion honored, even if it isn’t one agreed with.
What would happen in this world if we were able to listen objectively to facts without leaping in with our own opinions or preconceived notions?
What sorts of shifts would happen if we did? How would the world become better (or worse?)
I’m reminded of one of my favorite movies, “Pleasantville” where everything was in black and white, no opinions were allowed except for the generally accepted, overwhelmingly bland, distastefully untasty.
When people were allowed to express their opinions and people were allowed to thoughtfully (and respectfully) agree or disagree, a certain amount of chaos began to spread as the black and white gave way to color.
It doesn’t matter if you remember the film or the process, what matters is if you are willing to both speak up and listen. What matters is if you are willing to give up a certain level of control in order to understand and if you have the ability to be objective rather than positional and stand for the greatest good instead of what your opinion of the greatest good.
Think, in this moment, of two people and two situations: one you agree with and one you don’t agree with at all.
What are some ways to engage in open, fact-driven (not opinion driven) conversation surrounding both people and their circumstances?
Ultimately, people want to be understood after they are respectfully heard.
I challenge you to listen with your whole heart with your whole mind open, listening for objective details and facts not simply passionate emotion. It may seem like passionate emotion is where the “goods” are, I know this well.
I challenge you to step into listening differently so the world may benefit as a result.
I’m ready.
Are you?
= = =
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Julie Jordan Scott inspires people to experience artistic rebirth via her programs, playshops, books, performances and simply being herself out in the world. She is a writer, creative life coach, speaker, performance poet, Mommy-extraordinaire and mixed-mediaartist whose Writing Camps and Writing Playgrounds permanently transform people's creative lives. Watch for the announcement of new programs coming through the end of 2016.
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