From Kat at I Saw You Dancing: Today's #reverb12 prompt and image are courtesy of my lovely little sister Loukia:
Compare
the “you” from the beginning of 2012 to the “you” that you are now.
What new skills or talents have you learned or discovered this year?
Thank
you, Louki, for a wonderful way to celebrate our new accomplishments
this year. You have so many (starting your blog and trying your hand at
mosaic-making, to name but two) that I really should stop introducing
you as my "little" sister. :-)
If you're joining us for the
first time, everything you need to know about #reverb12 (including a
list of daily prompts, as they are published) can be found here and here. We're also using the hashtag #reverb12 on twitter and instagram.
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I mixed up my reverb writings and the outcome is perfect for these "new things" I have learned.
I have learned how to make jewelry that fits right in with my other body of work.
I have learned how to make photo montages that delight me. Something I have always wanted to do by the way.
I could tell you how this year I started making (and using) Soul Collage cards. I could tell you I learned to "speak pinterest".
I could tell you I learned to live with a scar this year (whether I like it or not.)
These are more "tasky" sorts of skills and talents.
I have tucked deep inside me many new skills in a way of being, in a way of responding to others I find richer than any of my "I can do this now" skills.
This year I learned to state my plans clearly and using a variety of means to communicate it. I have learned to have Plan A and Plan B ready always aware I may need to pull plan XYZ or ! A-5 or.... switch my opinions about my plans in the first place. After all, as John Lennon said, "Life is what happens when you are busy making other plans."
I started 2012 hurt, shell shocked and grieving. I had climbed a different mountain and was sore, aching and yet continuing to pick up my feet and walk, one step at a time. It was one of a lot of mountains.
This year, for example, I have climbed up several mountains, not quite as large as the 2011 one, but still very tall and in some ways a steeper climb and more rocky in spaces. I have come to learn my face will always be scarred and this time next year I may have had more surgeries and have a tick tack toe board for a face.
I am resiliant. So is my heart and my face and my vagina. We tend to bounce back, even when stomped upon like a stilleto heal stomping out a cigarette.
I was reminded and have integrated in an entirely new level that silence is a poeten weapon that hurts, oh it hurts. It is like a spear with two sharp ends. On one side, the person waiting for the silence to end gets pierced. Her aches and groans and disbelief pummel the other end toward the person - maybe feeling guilty yet not wanting to own the guilt. Maybe the silence holder doesn't want to say what will disappoint her and hurt feelings, not getting that silence is worse than that. Much worse than any disappointment from the news. With every ounce of strength from her bleeding spear wound, she pushed a point into her nemesis/love.
Most of the time, he turns away from the spear's sharpness, denial perhaps?
It drives the spear more deeply into her, cutting her this way and that, leaving her wounded and bleeding, her confidence shredded on the ground with tiny pieces of it being shuffled about gleefully by the wind's fingers.
The one waiting for the silence to end, the one who is speared and on the ground, has a choice now. She can clean and dress the wound and repeat the process as long as it takes.
She learns it is best to continue the care until she feels capable of trying again or at least move toward full forgiveness.
I have learned this in 2012. They were not in my plan, yet I value them highly. Amen.
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