Yesterday Emma invited her choir friend to our home so she could give her some vocal coaching. It was awesome to hear her encouragement of her friend and actually hear the improvements as they worked together for nearly two hours.
When I drove the friend home, a red flag waved before me once again.
She talked about the Middle School she attended. It is the Middle School some of Samuel’s IEP team has mentioned for him to attend next year. During our last IEP meeting I suggested Samuel attend sixth grade in his current school, since he is doing fine in his current mainstream situation, why move him to another school for sixth grade?
I agreed to visit the school and talk to the principal, but I hesitate to share with her everything I have heard. I continue to have a difficult time trusting educrats, even with all the experience I have now had in working with them. I recognize Middle School is the most challenging time socially for all kids. Maybe I should just agree to a Special Day Class – but I worry he will regress and then won’t make it to Gen Ed in high school and then won’t be able to transition successfully to college.
He is smart enough to attend college someday. His eldest sister is at a Seven Sister college three thousand miles from home. His middle sister is a freshman in high school in honors classes. While I don’t expect him to follow exactly in their footsteps, I know he has the capabilities intellectually.
I find myself hesitating to label what I am feeling.
I am feeling frightened, concerned for my son, and projecting way too far into the future.
Maybe instead of worrying about the meeting with the educrat, I simply need to schedule the meeting first. Maybe instead of worrying about the milieu of the school I should visit it first from as open a mind as possible. Maybe instead of worrying about the level of academics I should visit the classroom and see for myself.
I never worried this much for Samuel’s neurotypical sisters. He has autism. They don’t have autism. My worry may or may not be completely warranted.
Love means I want the best for my child, not just the getting by for my child.
It also means taking his education one step at a time. More than likely we will take smaller steps than I took with my daughters. That doesn’t make it wrong, it simply is taking smaller steps.
I am grateful Emma’s sweet friend waved the red flag, because it reminds me to take the steps I most need to take rather than getting distracted and finding myself in May without any sort of plan or strategy.
Love means I am become more aware so that is exactly the small step I am taking now.
Follow me on Twitter: @JulieJordanScot
Julie Jordan Scott has been a Life & Creativity Coach, Writer, Facilitator and Teleclass Leader since 1999. She is also an award winning Actor, Director, Artist and Mother Extraordinaire. She was twice the StoryTelling Slam champion in Bakersfield. She teaches a teleclass/ecourse "Discover the Power of Writing & Telling Engaging, Enlightening Stories" which begins again soon! Find details by clicking this link.
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