I promised to write about my experience within the Labyrinth today. I will write it all and I will write it in slices rather than serve up a huge plate of "LABYRINTH!"
I am reminded of how Ekhart Tolle writes pauses into his chapters of The Power of Now.
Consider these slices of the moment to be each just the right size between pauses. Last night I wrote in short bursts and snippets, first a haiku: Angry sunset shouts ~ "Blast, blast, be lost in flame wrath!" Lava flows tremble and then some stream of consciousness bit'o'ramble about my weekly intention of "Create Space". Today I cleared more space, sadly scraped away something I should have scraped away at first inkling of "no" energy. I thought I could use my relentless optimism to morph that "no" energy into a "wow, this is great" and yet, the no-lid stuck. I am mostly (reluctantly) in agreement with this reality. I am sure tomorrow I will wake up feeling restored. For now I still have that crackling energy of anger - flames torching my thoughts. Tomorrow, I am going to pray it clean at the Labyrinth. I need to go there. Pray walk, walk pray. Teresa has been calling me awake again. I remember when I stood on the Edge with her. With Divinity and Teresa, calling me. All of a sudden I have been getting comments on my long ago blog post. So interesting to weave it together. I feel compelled to Release, Receive and take back to the world what has been received. Sounds like perfection. Sounds like exactly what I need. Clear the space to receive and then integrate it.
= = =
This morning I took a short drive across town to St. Philip's church where there is an outdoor labyrinth for community prayer - walk - contemplation - meditation.
I had never walked a labyrinth and I was a little bit nervous about doing it at all. One of my secret tactics is when my fear attempts to step in between my longing and my action I tell a lot of people, "I am going to do this!" I then leap-frog into the "ooohs" and "ahhhhhs" my friends offer me.
As always, my friends delivered the momentum I needed. From high school friends to college friends, to on-line friends to church friends came nods of affirmation.
I noticed as I drove along the usually dense with traffic and red lights Stockdale Highway it was unusually clear of traffic and all the lights were green. It was almost as if Teresa had planned a parade-for-two in honor of this momentous occasion.
I pulled into the parking lot and looked for the labyrinth, which wasn't where I thought it should be. I turned a corner and there it was, remarkably close to Stockdale Highway yet still inconspicuous behind several buildings. I noticed tables and chairs, some benches and space for contemplation so I didn't bring my folding chair with me as I had planned to do.
I set up a chair in the center of the Labyrinth with my notebook. I worried that I might be breaking a rule about walking around the Laburinth before I began my contemplation, but I also knew self soul care was signicant.
While my initial greeting of the labyrinth was joyful anticipation and expectancy, I was surprised about the hesitation to begin.
I re-read my scribbled notes:
1. Walk with expectancy
2. Be still quiet listen still be
3. Let go of worries and the stories that accompany them.
4. I am loved
I am free
I am forgiven
5. Focus is on Divinity and our relationship~ in the holy space at the center remember to be myself, be real, there is no rush. Let God know me. Let God heal me. Receive.
Receive.
Receive.
6. On the walk back to the world, reflect on change from the experience and integrating that change into my soul-self and the world. Freely receive, allow it to kindle, kindle, kindle.
7. Psalm 139
8. Remember - Where I walk has made an impression ~
I closed my notebook and set it at the center to wait for the conversation and insights to be held, deeply, in language as well as in the wordless center.
I stood at the entrance to the labyrinth and took a deep breath-prayer. I greeted Divinity as I stepped into the space.
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