Julie Unplugged

Bridge, Love and a Full Moon Dreamboard

It is Full Moon Time again, and like in April, I created a Full Moon dream board from the prompting at Jamie Ridler Studios. What a blessing this process has become for me.

Last month I was soooo into my Full Moon Dream Board creation, I busily collected images and when it came time to put it together, I was chomping at the bit to bring it all into fruition.

This month, the images and the process hovered in the background but when it was ready for the board to come to life – it did so in bursting color.

 

Once again, I created from images of my own with two incredible images from my friend/photographer Michelle Guerrerro (the one of me in the river and the one with me and my daughters.) The theme?

BRIDGE – from a Divine Message I received at least ten years ago at a Women’s Retreat. I “got” “Julie, my love you are a bridge.”

 This message guided me into my most successful and fruitful times professionally and it is back, with a vengeance, and when I look at the bridge photos I have collected – some are bridge metaphors as much as bridge structures – I get it, I simply get it.

And it feels SOOOO incredible.

I loved tearing the definition of BRIDGE from the old dictionary I use in my art. It reads like this:

“A structure erected over a depression or obstacle, as over a river, roadway, railroad, etc.”

 The background of the dream board is blue and green enamel paint, gleaned from Cameron’s supply. They are indicative of the water, the Earth and heaven. I have already used the board as my writing prompt today. Looking forward to the a-ha’s throughout the month….

Thank you, Jamie, for the context of this process. Feeling blessed!

Art Happens #CED2010

There is something that happens when creative people gather. Magic just floats into place. Especially if you have created together before: you have grown to know and trust each other. You "get" each other and respect each other on a higher plane. 

It isn't every day you have a picture taken that encompasses so much of who you are, but on Saturday, it happened. I was with a group of women who were gathered at one of my favorite places in the world to help our friend, Michelle, build her photography portfolio and enjoy one another's presence at the same time.

I dipped my toes into the river - you see, the Kern River is like a dear friend to me. She and I are buddies, we know each other. I dipped my toes into the river and it was as if a jolt of electricity went through me. I needed to have my photo taken while I was in the river.

It didn't matter that it was probably only in the low 60's and the water was snow melt water, I was going to go into the river. What was so delightful was that as soon as I was to my waist, I was so deleriously happy, I didn't even feel cold anymore.

Photography like this is such a joyfully collaborative event: the model (feels so weird to call myself that) takes her creative calling and offers it up to the photographer, who then adds her vision into the moment and together, art happens. 

I think my face says all there is to say here. Art Happens.

 

Sometimes connecting with people and introducing them to new places is something that makes art happen as well. See, here? In the photo below?

This is Viola, my recent couch surfing guest, when we went to Giant Sequoia National Monument. See how the sun is hitting her face? It felt like a divine thing, like art feels like a divine thing to me. 

Viola is from Germany and will, more than likely, never see these trees ever again.

Art happens. 

 

 

Sunday's Wordless Wednesday - Bliss in the River

(Possible my new favorite photo if me, ever)

Julie Jordan Scott publishes her ezine, the Daily Passion Activator, which includes an Essay and a Poem every week day - inspiration delivered directly into your email box. Why not Subscribe today? It's free.

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The Firey Journey to Reveal "What do you wish to have?" (Thank you, @Starshyne!)

As I prepare to write my Wishcasting entry, I can’t help but hear a chorus of voices from my past, intoning slight variations along the theme of “You just can’t do anything in a small way, can you?”

 

The “small way” tended to include either a facial or a vocal jeer or both and I always ended up feeling somehow less than even if I had accomplished something unique, visionary or just more out there than most people are comfortable with, but the jeers left a lasting scar on my psyche. That scarred kid doesn’t want to post my wish, doesn’t want to admit the lengthy process I took to getting to my wish because I just checked and a whole slew of you dove right into the wish without risking life, limb or burning down your homes.

 

This wish question has actually been burning through me since I first read it, which was at about one a.m. before I went to bed. I was thinking it might be a simple prompt and I could be one of the first wishcasters. 

My eyes gazed at the seemingly simple question Jamie posed to us, “What do you wish to have?”

I knew I wouldn’t be writing until much later in the day. In fact, as I sit to write this post, it is nearly twelve hours away.

 

The first thing that popped into my head was a concept I learned when I trained as a Life Coach – the Be-Do-Have Model. The “have” is the result, in this model. It is normally a tangible and it is what we get dependent upon what actions we take in simply being the person we are. Simple enough, right?

 

Yes. And no.

 

Last week our wishcasting question was “What do you wish to experience?” and I shared about my wish to experience “freedom” – I could very easily switch it up and say “I want to have freedom” but to me, freedom is a concept – not something tangible. It isn’t something I can hold on to and yes, it can be experienced but I can’t hold it, I can’t contain it.

 

I read my second paragraph in last week’s wishcast and it pointed to my struggle.

 

When I look at the “have” part of “be-do-have” I look at how well I have done with my bank account: how much money I have saved, how many clients I have, how many students are in my classes, what is left over at the end of the month, how much stuff I have been able to offer my children…. and since my brother died and Mom got sick and  Sam got diagnosed, my focus has changed.

 

Quite frankly, I am sick of singing that song and am now restoring my former dreams of “having” – my most basic wish for “having” includes (and has included for a long, long time) having $25,000 dollars in spendable, accessible cash in three bank accounts, flowing in and flowing out all the time.

 

It has been my formula since I started my Coaching business and I have always loved it. It worked until life fell apart.  All of a sudden, it lost its importance during the crisis times.  Now, having seems almost foreign.

 

I also realized through the work I have been doing for the last week or so that I have a life-long pattern to break here – where at the moment I am at the top of my game, it holds steady for a bit and then crashes. My dream is blasted to pieces, oftentimes taking me by complete surprise.

 

This happened as early as the fifth grade for me.

 

If I look back and am honest, this happened when I was thirteen months old – or at least a variation of it did.

 

I did some journaling on having. I created a statement and some art around I felt was powerful about “what I wish to have” and decided to create a ritual around it as well. I felt unsettled still.

 

Here is my wish: I wish to have – $25, 000 flowing in and out of three accounts which comes as the result of ©doing  what I love which

comes from ©being who I am meant to be….

 

(A bridge to understanding, awareness)

 

I wish to be conscious of the plenty, grateful for the plenty, generous with the plenty. I wish to experience financial prosperity in every aspect of my life.

 

I decided I would take one of the hearts bearing my statement and burn it, offering its loveliness to divinity – as if to merge my wish with the Divine. I wanted to be sure to get a photo, too, ofcourse – since this is me, and I put the corner of the heart into my vanilla candle and the heart erupted in my hand.

 

 

I managed to snap a photo before I hurriedly put it out, but there was a moment where pure fear grabbed my heart. I wondered, just briefly, if I would even have a house when this ritual was complete.

 

I still wasn’t ready to write my wish.

 

I went to my weekly Expressive Painting session at the Art and Spirituality Center at Mercy Hospital and brought along my wishcrafting materials. I painted. And painted. And painted. 

 

I noticed I was painting from the bottom of the painting up this week. I wrote a line without thinking, “Grace fills your brush”. I painted infinity signs, sort of. They were green. I put layers of infinity symbols within layers of infinity symbols. I watched the paint reaching up and up and up and then I did something counter-intuitive: I added water and allowed it to drip.

 

I surrendered to the paint, I surrendered to the water, I surrendered to this wish.

 

It is an ancient wish that goes beyond the tangible having, it is an ancient wish that is sacred, tying in generosity, gratitude, and the sacred art of giving and receiving.

When I go to the art and spirituality center, I leave my paintings behind. They are wet when I leave, so it is wiser and besides, it helps me with detachment. This week was difficult though, and I felt the tears rising in my throat as I said goodbye to Sister Sherry. I whispered, choked voice toning, “It is difficult to leave it…”

 

I took photos of my wish-painting and they don’t hold the energy for me yet, the belief of pending loss feels so heavy, I can’t feel the grace I felt during the sacred creative process. Remember, the pattern has been, “When at the top of the game, it all crashes down.”

 

My leaving it behind and surrendering to the being at the top and surrendering to it all crashing down is a part of the wish. Somehow I am getting as I work through this process that being satisfied regardless of crash and regardless of top status is what will bring the concrete wish of having – $25, 000 flowing in and out of three accounts which comes as the result of ©doing  what I love which comes from ©being who I am meant to be….

 

(A bridge to understanding, awareness)

 

Wow. That is some powerful stuff.

 

Thank you, Jamie and fellow wishcasters.

 

What do you wish to have?

Julie Jordan Scott publishes her ezine, the Daily Passion Activator, which includes an Essay and a Poem every week day - inspiration delivered directly into your email box. Why not Subscribe today? It's free.

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How to move from To-Do to TA-DA!

Text sent, earlier today: “I am working from a ‘Ta-Da’ list as well as a To-do list today!”

 

I was compiling a list of all the things I want to accomplish today and as the list grew and my heart grew heavier and heavier, I decided I was going to compile a completely different list while I was at it: A Ta-Da list.

 

I used to use the title “accomplishment list” but “Ta-Da List” just sounds so much more playful, so much more fun.

 

I have my ‘Ta-Da list’ sitting next to me now.  It has several items on it. In a moment I will add “write an essay for Daily Passion Activator” to the list which so far includes  “750words.com; gratitudes; Samuel to school; Psalms study; LiaSophia letter, LM for Khristine, cleaned bathroom, worked on lines…” and just seeing this alternative list grow I feel satisfied rather than overwhelmed.

 

Instead of feeling defeated, I feel accomplished.

 

Instead of feeling overwhelmed, I am filled with a “Yes, I can” spirit.

 

Instead of procrastinating, I look forward to adding my next “Ta-Da! I did it!” to my list.

 

What “Ta-Da’s!” are you celebrating today?

 

I dare you to start your own Ta-Da list. 

#1 - If you work with a "To Do" list, take a second sheet and write "Ta-Da" on it. Instead of only crossing stuff OFF your "To Do" built a constructive "Ta-Da!" list. I find over and over again I do much more than what I have written on my "To Do" list.

#2 - If you don't work with a "To Do" list (and yes, that is perfectly fine) start your Ta-Da! list with a quick brainstorm of what you have accomplished so far today. At the end of the day, think about what you would have liked to achieve that you didn't, and start a "Possibilities" list for tomorrow as a foundation for your Ta-Da! list. This simple step starts your mind working on how to fulfill on your hopes and intentions.

#3 - Let the celebrations and Ta-Da! dances begin as you move from the heaviness of "To Do" to the delightfulness of "Ta Da!"

If you would like to use the same form I use, I would be glad to send you a copy.

Just pop me an email at juliejordanscott at hotmail.com and put TA-DA! somewhere in the subject. I am giggling as I envision my email box filled with "TA-DA!" What could be more fun than that?

 

Julie Jordan Scott publishes her ezine, the Daily Passion Activator, which includes an Essay and a Poem every week day - inspiration delivered directly into your email box. Why not Subscribe today? It's free.

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Go-ahead - Activate Your Passion.

 

Don'ts

blot violent blot
covered my don’t’s
and sucked my
tears back inside
tar stains my
heels, grags my
“No” and “Don’t”

down, now only
sludge remains
alone and reminds
me of the
“Don’t live” refrain
Don’t cry
Don’t indulge in
emotion orgies

don’t blots
memories

leaves life

unexpressed

don’t

blot

don’t’s

#Wishcasting Wednesday - Today I wish to experience.....(Thank you, @starshyne!)

What do I wish to experience? That is the question of the week at Jamie Ridler's studio: our question, a community question. What do I wish to experience?

 

I could use an anstract concept - freedom. I could say "I want to experience freedom" but without a concrete or tangible description, I am left hanging. It is like a movie you go to see where you see only the background and the camera stays still. No people, no dialogue, no interaction, no build - just background, non-descript, you don't know what or where that is:…

 

So, I will create here, on wishcasting day - what freedom is to me - the “what I wish to experience” as freedom.

 

I wish to experience freedom through plenty in every aspect of my life. The first that springs to my mind and heart feels like this: time freedom – enough moments with no agenda, simply intention merged with action. Some people might assign agenda to that, to me – intention merged with action is the sweetest collaboration with Divinity. It is like my trips chasing the sunset. I choose a location (oftentimes with sacred nudging) like the road from Bakersfield to Glennville, for example, and we drive. We find cool spots and we photograph and we laugh and we breathe and we stand on bridges and giggle and skip stones of any creeks we find, not because there is a purpose other people can see, but because we feel light when we do it and it fuels all the "important stuff" we are up to as world changers, as lovers of humanity, as visionaries striving - playing to bring into form what we know is true.

 

I wish to experience freedom through plenty in every aspect of my life. I want to have enough financial flow and money freedom in and around me so that there are no worries about paying for anything or having enough cash flow for whatever my heart desires, whatever “stuff” I need to fulfill my role as a world changer: I don't hold on too tightly, I don't have to say "no" unless it is an empowered, choice driven "no". I can support the charities I want to support, I can give contributions to causes that call to me. When I experience freedom through financial abundance, I have more than enough.  I am conscious of the plenty, grateful for the plenty, generous with the plenty. I wish to experience financial prosperity in every aspect of my life.

 

I wish to experience community through relationship abundance in every aspect of my life. I am especially blessed in this department in my here and now, though I want to (always) grow my relationships richer and deeper. I want to take conversations farther, I want to have more friends I love in relationship with each other. I want to host more events because I love to entertain, just don't do it very often these days. I wish to experience relationship abundance in every aspect of my life: professionally, spiritually, creatively, as a mom, a sister, a networker, as a world changer. I want to be a part of knitting people together, connecting them, being that bridge to other people’s freedom in community. Interesting. I am seeing “exponential” freedom or freedom that multiplies. Cool concept to explore…

 

I wish to experience creative abundance, in every aspect of art. I want to create whatever stirs me. This is another area where it is flowing, flowing, flowing - but still, I feel this urge to do whatever comes along that I like simply because (if I am honest, I will say it so I will) I have this underlying fear the opportunity won't spring back to form. "If I don't grab this role now, if I don't audition for this or that, if I don't take this photo, if I don't write this poem, if I don't write this essay - I will never have the option to do it again."  I want to experience abundance in my creativity - freedom to create and a trust in Divinity that yes, what I wish will be delivered exactly as it is meant to be delivered. I don't have control, anyway, as ridiculous as it seems to me to think I am the one at the helm. After all, collaborative art is my favorite art.

 

I wish to experience spiritual abundance. Time to study, to grow, to connect with Divinity and others, what I like to call “Divinity with skin”.  The study of the Psalms I am doing right now in my playful homage to the Benedictine Monk that lives within my spirit, is helping with that. I am experiencing such joy from it and it is so very simple. That is how freedom is: very very simple. So that means opening my Bible - The Message is my favored version - and reading, and interacting with the scripture and loving the words, the energy, the time there. The writing that comes, the prayer and insights that come delight me to my core. I wish to experience more people who praise and worship and pray along the lines which I do, like finding Sister Sherry who then read Hafiz. Never thought I would find a Nun who apparently loves the Sufi mystics as much as I love the Sufi mystics. There is freedom, for me, in finding Christians who can admit "I love the Sufi mystics!" rather than hide our Rumi books in closets and never think of sharing the poetry with one another. Freedom.

 

There is so much more I could write about each of these experiences of Freedom.

 

Perhaps that will be one of my assignments this week. (I wish to experience the joy of doing assignments, of living the wish casting questions rather than just wish them and not return to them.)

 

I wish to experience living the question: In what ways do I wish to experience freedom?

 

Care to join me?

 

In what ways do you wish to experience freedom?

 

 

From Daily Passion Activator: It is SOOOO worth it!

An hour ago I rested in bed, gazing softly at my most recent vision board, convinced I was tired and needing to take a power nap. I never managed to fall asleep, but I did manage to stretch, to rest, and to invigorate myself through alternative “restful” means.

 

In short: I engaged in restful meditative movement and creativity and just like that, I was re-engaged with my projects and in the snap of my fingers, was poised for my next a-ha as well as preparing to cross the next item off my “to-do” list.

 

What did I do?

 

I listened to what my body wanted.

 

My body wanted to move, so I took my legs, feet, hands, breath, eyes, senses and the rest of me out for a walk around the block. Not a long walk at all, because I didn’t believe I had much time to invest.

 

We took my camera and did not take the dogs.

 

I set up my writing space before I left with my vision board, my most recent “in-progress” art, my pencils and notebook, drank two glasses of water and set out the door.

 

It is challenging for me to describe in words how it felt to walk across my lawn toward the street. I pulled my shoulders back, stretched and let out a deep breath. It was as if the clouds were reaching down to hug me and I hugged them back.

 

I noticed things and took photos.

 

I smelled freshly mowed grass and saw the sun poke through the pine, the stop sign discouraging the flash and fruit coming to term.

 

I composed lists, opened my heart and arrived back home more awake and alert than I had been since the frenetic energy of the weekend took over on Friday.

 

I wrote in my journal, just clips and phrases which would be meaningless to anyone but me, jots such as “pink-purple-green watercolor photos. Crayons, receiving. Arms dance, feminine skirt, twirl, barefoot – pants bent turned up to let salt water roam.”

 

I boiled water so that I could sweep the mulberries from my tree off my neighbor’s driveway. Each Spring the tree causes what feels like an international stand-off. This year, I had the tree trimmed yet the fruit continues to fall. I am sweeping and cleaning the driveway and even if their complaints mount and heads shake over furrowed brows, I will know I will be the daytime mulberry fairy whether they notice it or appreciate it or not.

 

I wouldn’t have noticed if I hadn’t set off for a few moments of restful, meditative movement.

 

I just noticed the time. It was about an hour ago I set off, one foot in front of the other, in my slightly eccentric looking outfit. More than slightly, if I admit it, which I will do right no in order to keep this writing true, just like the sweeping mulberries and photos of the clouds and breathing in of lavender and roses and fresh mown grass is and was true.

 

I have invested an hour of time and in return, I received true abundance, true images, true peace. Oh, it was so worth each moment.

 

Oh, it is so worth it.

 

What time will you invest today in peace, in abundance, in images?

 

It is so worth it.

= = =

Julie Jordan Scott publishes her ezine, the Daily Passion Activator, which includes an Essay and a Poem every week day - inspiration delivered directly into your email box. Why not Subscribe today? It's free.

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With All This Wonderfulness, Where Do I Begin? #CED2010

In a nutshell: My entire week was a creative flow following intuitive hit after intuitive hit. Incredible.

It is one of those weeks where I barely know where to start, so much wonderfulness has filled the space of these seven days, how do I quantify or qualify them as best or better or exceptional or remarkable when they all are all of that and more?

 

I think the best way to start is where I left off last week: with the beginnings of the NaPoCento Assemblage.

Working on this project this week reminded me how much I have grown as an artist since the moment I first dared call myself (even in the softest whisper) a visual artist. I still half-cringe when I declare that because it is so much easier for me to say I am a writer, I am a poet, I am an actor.

 

Somehow, even saying I am an actor is still a struggle – not the gender explanation since I am a female actor rather than an actress, but even seven years after I redevoted myself to the craft of acting, I continue to be surprised when director’s choose me for their productions – and I digress.

 

My NaPoCento Assemblage is a fine example of how I approach my art: being clueless and reveling in the not knowing, even when scared to death. I love how it is looking, even in its still state of incompletion. I have learned paper is easier to mold when it is wet, so now when I paint I immediately bunch it up and glue it. Makes for messy, sticky hands, but I like the effect more. I chose to use pages from a Scholastic Youth Dictionary, a copy of on of Jane Shineda Bolen’s books about goddesses and Helen Gardner’s A History of Art, in the 3^rd edition which has been around since 1961 – even longer than I have been around.

 

I was so inspired by the NaPoCento Project, I started on two other poetry-art projects AND managed to pitch an art/performance show which is now scheduled to go up in January. Yay. Add “Curator” to my resume, come 2011. Once again, I find myself leaping into that “I don’t know what the hell I am doing but I know I want to so, hey, I’m going to!” space.

 

I attended a conference call on Monday or Tuesday for Jen Louden’s Comfort Café and it was about living from your strengths. That lead me to decide I need to investigate talent agents in Los Angeles, specifically talent agents who work with character actors and unconventional talent. I know such a thing MUST exist, but I am having not the easiest time finding such a thing.

 

This lead me to poke around Craig’s List in L.A. in the film/video category which lead me back to the Bakersfield film/video category and by Wednesday just before noon I found myself cast in a Korn video (as in the rock band) here in Bakersfield which was to shoot Thursday morning.

 

It was a surreal experience – wonderfully surreal – from the crew meeting me at the location saying “The actors are here, talent is here… everyone… here, let’s get you to make up and wardrobe, Julie, come on honey baby sweetie pie…” or some variation of the same.

 

I had recruited my friend, Jared, to play my husband in re-enacting a domestic violence situation the lead singer of Korn had witnessed when he was driving along with some cops in the part of Bakersfield called Oildale, which is where our part of the video was filmed.

 

For those who have been following me, I have been in a few films – a National Geographic documentary, an “almost student but not in school student film” called Carte Blanche and an Inclusion Films production called Zombie High.

 

This was definitely the largest crew and it felt like the highest stakes.

 

It was a blast. The crew was fantastic and Jared and I kept feeling like we had dropped into some alternate universe. We were technically “featured extras” but they treated us like we were extra-special, down to bringing us water if we said we were thirsty – ok, that was just me but I was repeatedly running down a dirt road barefoot and screaming – but they took care of our clothes, hung everything up, they followed me around with my shoes so that I wouldn’t have to walk around barefoot after they called “CUT!”

 

Plus we got paid, which to community theater actors is a big deal.

 

I enjoyed working with the director, Phil Mucci, and to this day, I am not sure what the guy’s title is who cast me and walked alongside for the entire process, but his first name is Ian and hey – I am grateful to you!

 

I will save writing about Intuitive Painting for a later blog post – this is long enough as it is!

 

Like I said, there is a lot of wonderfulness that filled this week.

 

Last week’s post ended asking this: “which question or word combination wants your attention?”

 

And

 

“What words hover at the edge of your intuition?”

 

I followed my intuition into insatiable growth this week. What happened for you?

 

What will you leap into next? I can’t wait to hear.

 

   

 

Julie Jordan Scott publishes her ezine, the Daily Passion Activator, which includes an Essay and a Poem every week day - inspiration delivered directly into your email box. Why not Subscribe today? It's free.

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The Artistic Mother: Vision Statement and More In Progress....

I have been working on my Artist’s Statement and now, on my Artistic Vision project with the Artistic Mother group for what feels like an eternity.

I am going to do something risky here:

 

I am going to share my artistic statement (which includes a bit of vision, but not much) here, in rough draft form, just to get it out there.

 

I am also working on my Artistic Vision project and it is very different than what Shona Cole created in the book because… well, I felt compelled to take something I had started and re-work it.

 

I am going to attach some goal lists to the bottom of what will be my Vision Statement Box… and here is a corner of it – can you guess what it is? What has paint on it and is tucked inside a wooden square?

Here is my statement for now… and thank you for being out there, moving right along. Knowing you are out there, moving right along, gives me oomph when I don’t think I have any oomph.

 

I am an artist who believes in creativity from and alongside and because of Divinity.

 

I am an artist whose primary and most potent art form is seen in the faces and spirit of my children, themselves, without them doing anything - just their creation. Not even living and breathing because Marlena never lived or breathed outside my womb and yet, she is a part of the equation.

 

I am an artist whose anchor art is words, who loves to move words, mold words, sculpt words, take a laser beam into the word flow to discover new worlds, light a match, shine a flashlight, see words and see with words.

 

Really, really see.

 

I am an artist who tries new things, consistently. I wear thigh high boots and wade into the water, sometimes losing my footing and falling into the water, covering my face with water silt, rust and coming up laughing sometimes and crying sometimes.

 

Neither is better than the other, they both simply are coming up out of the water.

 

I am an artist who allows myself to feel all of it, the stuff I label "unpleasant" sometimes turns out to be the most pleasant of all.

 

I am an artist who loves.

 

I

I am

I am an

I am an artist

I am an artist who

I am an artist who loves

I am an artist who loves well

I am an artist who loves well and thrives in connection with others yet also needs, craves, devours solitude.

I am an artist on the edge of my blossoming.

I am an artist who takes rules and crushes them.

I am an artist who ignores rule books and norms and flaunts that fact.

I am an artist who surprises people because I certainly don't look like a "bad-ass" or a "super-heroine" and I sorta like taking them by surprise this way.

I am an artist who loves surprising people.

I am an artist who thrives on pushing the edge, making it spread wide open for me.

Come on, just like that SURPRISE ME! I tell it. SURPRISE! ME!

= = =

 

Julie Jordan Scott publishes her ezine, the Daily Passion Activator, which includes an Essay and a Poem every week day - inspiration delivered directly into your email box. Why not Subscribe today? It's free.

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