I always pray that my children trust me.
I worry, perhaps too much, that they won't, that I will do something stupid or hurtful or somehow... lose their trust.
Sometimes when I pick Sam up he does this thing where he just leans into me and completely trusts me to hold him rather than making any effort to "hold onto" me.
I read that this may be a function of Austism.
I don't know why, but I felt much better when I thought it was a choice to trust me to hold him up, to trust me to take care of him, to trust me to enjoy his quirkiness rather than squelch it.
He got upset this morning because the dog food labels weren't facing out. He likes to stack up the cans, and because feeding Hank is his job, he lifts the top can off and hands it to me to take off the top and then he feeds a grateful Hank, which helps Sam to feel very accomplished.
The top label wasn't perfectly aligned with the others.
I used to think this was Sam's logical, engineering nature that made him do this. After all, his Great-Grandpadaddy had a Master's Degree in Electrical Engineering before this was a brand new profession.
Now I read that rigidity is yet another echo of autism.
I am thinking ok, it may be part of the autism, but more than that... it is his logical, organized, engineering side, too.
He isn't autism. He has some form of autism. The more I learn, the more I see the variety of labels he may eventually be given is as varied as the colors of the rainbow.
I need to take Katherine to her babysitting job.
Just look at those eyes. They are my eyes, too.
I worry, perhaps too much, that they won't, that I will do something stupid or hurtful or somehow... lose their trust.
Sometimes when I pick Sam up he does this thing where he just leans into me and completely trusts me to hold him rather than making any effort to "hold onto" me.
I read that this may be a function of Austism.
I don't know why, but I felt much better when I thought it was a choice to trust me to hold him up, to trust me to take care of him, to trust me to enjoy his quirkiness rather than squelch it.
He got upset this morning because the dog food labels weren't facing out. He likes to stack up the cans, and because feeding Hank is his job, he lifts the top can off and hands it to me to take off the top and then he feeds a grateful Hank, which helps Sam to feel very accomplished.
The top label wasn't perfectly aligned with the others.
I used to think this was Sam's logical, engineering nature that made him do this. After all, his Great-Grandpadaddy had a Master's Degree in Electrical Engineering before this was a brand new profession.
Now I read that rigidity is yet another echo of autism.
I am thinking ok, it may be part of the autism, but more than that... it is his logical, organized, engineering side, too.
He isn't autism. He has some form of autism. The more I learn, the more I see the variety of labels he may eventually be given is as varied as the colors of the rainbow.
I need to take Katherine to her babysitting job.
Just look at those eyes. They are my eyes, too.
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