I still don't know if I have figured out this form AND I have enjoyed the process. I find myself writing these in my head all the time, my inner narrator becoming the voice of The Dead Woman. Perhaps it is because I have lost another friend to cancer so recently.
Big Tent prompted me. You may see other poems from this prompt at their blog beginning on Friday.
This is actually the third poem I have written but since only two have been put on paper, I am titling it:
Dead Woman Poem #2
The dead woman looked at her daughter from inside the mirror.
Her daughter turned her head just slightly, inspecting the pleading
green eyes that stared back at her in the silvery glass.
Was she looking for non-existent wrinkles?
The dead woman wished she could touch the skin, help her, somehow.
She waited and stared. She stared and waited.
Her daughter turned.
The dead woman would have cried if she had functioning tear ducts.
The dead woman would have chased her daughter if she had feet
The dead woman would have held on to life if she thought it was possible.
The dead woman no longer lived.
The dead woman thought, "I am not writing these poems in the right way."
The dead woman thought, "What is the right way, anyway."
The dead woman watched her daughter turn off the light
as she left for work at a job she hated.
She saw her daughter hesitate and turn, confused,
looking toward the mirror in the bathroom.
Slowly, the daughter shut the door and turned the
key from the outside.
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follow me on twitter: @juliejordanscot
so glad you liked the prompt! me, too! i havent written yet but you all are inspiring me.
Posted by: carolee | December 18, 2010 at 06:53 AM
Great poem. "The dead woman thought, "I am not writing these poems the right way, and then the next line, made me laugh out loud. Exactly how I felt. My daughter is 15, your piece moved the mom in me deeply. thanks!
Posted by: brenda w | December 18, 2010 at 07:09 AM
This is a great piece! The thought of her looking out of the mirror at her daughter, and the daughter perhaps sensing something is magical, and shows so much imagination...Loved it!
Posted by: Cynthia Short | December 18, 2010 at 07:46 AM
I too fell in love with this form, and I love what you did with this. I became that dead woman - you got me right into her head.
Posted by: nan | December 18, 2010 at 08:10 AM
well done indeed......I liked this form also....thanks for sharing this Julie
Posted by: wayne | December 18, 2010 at 12:07 PM
Ah, the beauty of promtps, they let them make them into our own uses. Rules, schmules. This is wonderful and human. Full of longing.
I'm sorry for your loss. But glad you have words.
Posted by: Deb | December 18, 2010 at 12:10 PM
Incredibly moving. The daughter's last look was heartbreaking.
Posted by: Tilly Bud | December 20, 2010 at 01:08 AM