Weather Report, Too (A Follow Up Cascade Poem)

I wrote a poem earlier today for the BigTentPoetry Cascade poem prompt. It was decent... I liked it... but I felt the form called to metrical verse so I scribed this one. Quickly. Could use some reworking (and I will) but for now... here you are...

(And if you would like to see Weather Report, the First visit the link here.)

 

Weather Report, too

She stood still - letting grey clouds bite her face
(Or that which wasn't covered by a mask)
Self banished by the shouts "bloody disgrace!"

No one knew she had quit running the race
Opting out, the cowards way, was so unfamiliar
She stood still - letting grey clouds bite her face

Frank glared bullets as he called her to task
"What did he know?" forehead surrendered first
(Or that which wasn't covered by a mask)

Love had left years earlier, abandoned this place
She wasn't giving up, she was inviting emotions in
Self banished by the shouts "bloody disgrace!"

= = =

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Comments

[ms pie]

hmmm, i like this too julie, but i gotta tell ya i favor the first... maybe it is the revelation of the pain manifested in details in the "too" version.. i get such a kick outta titles... i like that you shared the two versions too and your thoughts....