Father, for I.....(Inspired Big Tent Poetry)

At Big Tent Poetry this week we were to shake up our writing life.

   

We were to look at our last twelve or so poems and catch ourselves being banal or consistently writing in one way or another. I found I haven’t written in much metrical verse lately but I have written in long and short lines, in first and third person… though I found certain…. Annoying characteristics.

So, rather than write differently, I decided to be a rebel and confess my poetic sins… because much of my poetry is confessional and really, I needed to be more original than more more more confessional poetry so I did confessional poetry, differently.

Forgive me, father,

for I have sinned

 

too many poetic

confessionals with a

slightly self indulgent

make that multiple

me me me binges

 

Forgive me, father,

for I have sinned

 

Tzck tzck tzck too

many clackety clackety

heard it, pen and paper

no need to ruminate

onomatopoetical sin

 

Forgive me, father,

for I have sinned

 

sentient sacred

ceremonial salt

tears tucked tautly

my memory morphs

alliteration, ah!

 

Forgive me, father,

for I have sinned

Comments

[vivienne blake]

Oh, but this is wonderful: takes me back to my childhood, scratching round for something to confess!

Maybe "a slight self indulgent" should be indulgence? (a play on words, as well as for the grammar!)

[Paul Oakley]

Julie, this is delightful! Absolutely love it. Love the way the poem models the "sins" it confesses. Love the way you literalized "confessional" poetry. Clever! and beautiful!

[barbara]

:)

[Mary]

We've all sinned. And will. Part of being human. You did confessional poetry differently, and that's okay. To write is the most important thing.

[Tumblewords]

Clever, clever!

[Derrick]

"onomatopoetical sin", is that really so bad, Julie?!

[Elizabeth]

Like Viv, you reminded me of the little girl who would kneel in the pew, trying her damnedest to come up with a new way to say:

I fought with my sister, who had it coming,
I sassed my Mother, who didn't
and about that boy who lives around the corner and down the block.....?

Really like your poem, a lot,

Elizabeth

[wayne]

confessed in a diffrent way indeed.....and well done Julie

[Mary]

Well written, and oh so original!

[gautami tripathy]

A very enjoyable read!

http://firmlyrooted.blogspot.com/2010/08/now-it-there-no-it-isnt.html