The best metaphor I can think of is a dish drainer when the dishes are removed and just shallow puddles of water sit, stale, in the bottom of the plastic dish under the drainer.
It was Mom-Schlep time plus I knew it was a rushing time. My children needed to be places, I needed to be places, I was being pulled and tweaked and tugged and underneath it I felt lifeless. Achy. Tired. Any excuse I could come up with, I was ready to spew and use as an excuse for my lack of lively usual me self.
What came next took me by surprise: almost as soon as I sat down with my cast mates, I felt better.
It was like someone gave me an injection of anti-ache or anti-whine.
My face was no longer grimacing, it was smiling.
I was no longer looking for excuses, I was looking for the next opportunity to interact.
When I reviewed yesterday today, something important popped into the equation:
Feeling yucky + negative anticipation + love for the art + participating in art = insta-improvement.
I doubt any of my cast mates had an inkling of “not feeling well” from me. “You powered right through that second run!” Laurie told me as I left.
I was more surprised, still, when I attended my second rehearsal for the night and sang myself into my usual musical blissed out self. It was midnight when I took off my “at the theater” cloak. I continued to float around energetically until I finally fell asleep in the wee hours of the morning.
Waking up and getting moving for the early morning Mom Schlep was no piece of cake, but I managed to get Emma’s chicken salad lunch made (along with chips and cookies) and Samuel dressed and out the door in less than fifteen minutes.
Earlier this week I wrote, “I tried to hate theater in 2011.”
I never managed to hate it completely. Much like my jaunts down the road of my Christian Religion, I continue to love Christ, it is some of the actions of the people who are vocal, unloving Christians that turn me away from conventional church.
My deep love and passionate desire to be involved with theater also invites eventual hurt, not from the art or the craft itself, but by disappointments from the people involved. It is a collaborative art, it is impossible to create alone, and yet – those very people you adored on one project may soon wear out their welcome in your periphery by show number twelve.
My job, I realize this morning, is to focus on the love, passion and active creativity. Allow the minor annoyances and sandpaper personalities to fall by the wayside. I also learned this week that sometimes those annoying people instantly improve, too, with an affirmative smile or a hand, held out for connection.
It is the opinion that causes the rift. Holding on to the hurt creates more misunderstandings.
I am still looking forward to a continued theater sabbatical after these two projects are complete, yet I know when I complete them I will feel less like a dish drainer and more like… a bouquet of flowers? A treasure chest of images? A well filled with champagne?
I’ll let go of the metaphor and simply continue to live with love, with passion, with hope, with my smile of connection paving the way.
Julie Jordan Scott inspires people to experience artistic rebirth via her programs, playshops, books, performances and simply being herself out in the world. She is a writer, creative life coach, speaker, performance poet, Mommy-extraordinaire and mixed-media artist whose Writing Camps and Writing Playgrounds permanently transform people's creative lives. Watch for the announcement of new programs coming in Fall, 2016 and beyond. To contact Julie to schedule a Writing or Creative Life Coaching Session, call or text her at 661.444.2735. Check out the links below to follow her on a bunch of different social media channels, especially if you find the idea of a Word-Love Party bus particularly enticing. Please stay in touch: Follow me on Twitter: and on Periscope for writing prompt, tips and inspiration daily created to ignite your artistic rebirth. Be sure to "Like" WritingCampwithJJS on Facebook. (Thank you!) Follow on Instagram And naturally, on Pinterest, too! © 2015
Julie Jordan Scott