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February 01, 2010

Comments

Yousei Hime

I like how her identity is hidden until the end. A little correction: "the one who doesn't" or "the ones who don't"

Congrats on your first Monday Train post. Thank you for sharing this lovely, upbeat poem.

Andy Sewina

Yeah, I like this, very refreshing! I love the dialouge bit, 'She sang' 'She crooned'.

Gordon Mason

Liked how you used 'rest' in two meanings and the expression'cement fragrance'.

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