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February 16, 2010

Comments

Cynthia Short

I really enjoyed this...it sounds like the lot of nearly every woman! The "actions" iin it such as pull, push, give, hold...were a great thematic idea!

Julie Jordan Scott

My subject gave me those words, Cynthia. Now my aim is to watch it and notice it more, each day. THANK YOU for your comment. I was so late this week, I wasn't sure if anyone would get to it or not.

Makeda42

It's a very down-to-earth spiritual poem and I liked it. The speaker is worried about peeling paint and gutters, but she still wants to find time for unseen.

Paul Oakley

Julie, it is one of the weakness of RWP's format that later posted poems frequently get few or no responses/reads. I'm glad I checked again and found this one of yours.

This is simple in form but moving! I particularly like these images:

You barely / Notice my / Peeling paint / Or the note / Jehovah / Witnesses / Left right there

The failure to see things that truly matter, the sacrifices made on our behalf - such a universal phenomenon.

Nicely done, Julie.

pamela

Julie lovely work I really enjoyed this a lot. Quite spiritual!

Pamela

rallentanda

What I liked best about this poem is the short staccato thought process and the personal nature of it.

marina

it is really a lovely poem!!!

irene

I felt I couldn't breathe. The lines are so constricted. And these lines speak,
I

Let you in

Keep them out

Hold wind back

Push rain down

The gutter

Like Cynthia I think the poem resonates like how a woman thinks and writes. Thanks Julie.

(I read your note about the password protection. Sorry! I forgot about the late readers. It's open for reading again.)

I hope your play turns out great.

SarahJ

Hi Julie -
I think the short lines work really well here, and the active verbs make it work like a fuse. enjoyed. thanks, sarah

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