Naked JJS

I am going to be performing Thursday night in an event called "Two Hours Inside"... most of the other poets are urban, hip, young slam style poets.

I am not.

I met with the producer of the event and felt... as if she was worried that I would not "fit in" and she is right, but she had specific reasons for including me. Probably the most notable is I am a "draw" amongst the artsy community here... and most people who know me like me.  The song she chose for my entrance says exactly that.

It embarasses me when I let it.

I have been going through my poetry looking for work that offers what she has asked me for - she specifically asked me for poetry about "Naked Julie" because she knows I have modeled in my own-self-directed nude photo shoots.. and a couple other-directed but within my parameters of comfort and I also frequent clothing optional hot springs... and she knows both of these facts may cause a bit of a sensation among the young, hip, urban crowd who only wishes to do such things.

I found some writing which I fashioned into a poem and read it aloud to myself and am so grateful I did because... it feels like these words have been begging to be shared.

Naked JJS

Her prompt said something like…..

“Standing stark naked in front of my friends, I want

To”… and the dot dot dot invitation to write and

I found, instead…

I don't want to STAND naked, I want to

BE naked with my friends.

Gentleness in touching, supporting. I remember

sitting back to back with Kelly,

my head against her shoulder, resting,

with her body a mirror image to mine.

I remember cavorting through

the woods, "stark naked" to an outsider but

clothed in much more than cotton

or linen or tweed.

Clothed in breath, in spirit.

Clothed in hands, held out in support, palm-to-palm,

steadied connection, a blanket of sunny granite, a

huge slab - all the covering needed in the just

above freezing weather.

It is Eden-like, conscious nakedness. Check your

"thought" at the door and become a part of

just-post birth... allow that sweetness to just be...

Hand massaging a random foot, a face resting against

a back, eyes deeply looking into eyes.

Fully naked, fully clothed, fully

you and fully me.

= = =

My naked body inspires me to roar. Seriously, roar.

Strong, that roaring, up from the stretch-mark-laden

belly. I roar at the nurse, "caring" for me as I

opened my vagina, also roaring, to let Katherine

out of the enormously enlarged uterus, still

confining, into the much colder world which

is confining in a different way.

My naked body inspires me to break molds and

myths regarding my own beauty. I imagine a

myth starring Martha Graham, Audre Lourde and me.

A dancer, a lesbian, an African-American, WASP

poet breaking molds, loosening the confines of

belief that anything "has to" be any particular

shape or style or form.

"The body always stands in truth" Martha's

doctor father tells us. I wonder what Audre's

Mom would say?

My mom's face doesn't smile

like it used to smile, it wants to but it

can't anymore, it can't

I am inspired by my naked body to listen to how

it moves my pen across the page.

= = =

What is sacred about my naked feminine body is... it

would be easy to say "everything" and yeah,

sure - that is true, but I am ever and always

tapped on the shoulder, reminded reminding

"Be specific!" so I am and I will.

"This is the body, broken for you" it goes. My

body. Sacred in its brokenness. Sacred in its

being holy and wholly female, in this culture,

the place I call "home" my naked body

deemed "less than" for centuries.

This is my body, broken. Knees hurting, still

healing, broken in honor of my sister witches,

fellow artists, a feeling-tattoo,

sacred to my soul.

"This is my blood, shed for you." My monthly

bleeding, shedding, monthly visitor just doing

its gate-talking now. Not quite ready to go.

I am not ready to be done with my feminine monthly

shedding, my sacred blood. Somehow it connects me

with my most important, most significant works

of art and to the woman who created me.

My body, my feminine naked body, sacred, broken,

shed.. for you. Each of you

all of you.

Standing stark naked here

in front of you, my friends, I

want to…

I don't want to STAND naked with you

I want to BE naked with you.

Each of you, all of you.

So, I am.

Comments

[pamela]

Julie,

I love this! Standing naked amongst people has always been a frightening concept for me. I have dreamt about it many times. This poem has a beautiful rhythm and the words just flow along smoothly. Love it!

Pamela
p.s. Thanks for the compliments on my poems, you make me feel inspired.

[RamonGustav]

Have you been turned down by other lenders?

[RamonGustav]

Do you desire a house but you lack enough cash to acquire it?

[Antivirus_man]

You write well will be waiting for your new publications.

[JOBS_frend]

I liked your site, you are very interesting to write. Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!

[school_dubl]

Hi Merry Christmas and Happy New Year